Two weeks ago I revamped Roseanne’s very 1980’s kitchen, and turned it into a modern and sleek space. Of course, I tried to stay true to that “Roseanne-A-Doo” feel because I’d never want to disappoint the Domestic Goddess (or I might end up like DJ after he stole the car! Spanked!). The makeover earned a retweet from the Queen herself, so I think she approved! Or maybe she hated it! (It was without commentary) Either way, I was honored! So, as promised, this week I am tackling the living room.
So, here’s what we’re working with:
Much like the kitchen, pale colors rule the day. That pale green on the wall is quite something, but the good news is that it’s not totally unfortunate. It’s almost minty, which happens to be in style right now. I would paint the entire room a neutral beige or grey, and incorporate that minty green by installing wallpaper on the wall behind the sofa. Of course my go-to for wallpaper, Chasing Paper, has the perfect print for the feature wall:
This print, called Tri-Angled, is bright and modern, and would drag the Conner family right into the Roaring Twenty-Teens (what the hell are we calling this decade anyway?)!
After manipulating David into painting the room for free, our next stop has got to be updating that furniture! The Conners need a sofa that can support a lot of familial shenanigans, while also protecting the pack of raccoons that, no doubt, lives underneath it (who should totally have their own show, btw! JJ Abrams, get on it).
Sofa- Let’s go with a solid sofa from a solid company, like Crate and Barrel. And I’m so sorry, Roseanne, but patterns are out. Instead, I’d go with a dark colored couch (to hide the street grime from Darlene’s butch combat boots), which can then be accented by patterned throw pillows. The Verano Sofa from C&B is luxurious, yet casual– perfect for the rambunctious Conner clan.
Chairs- I would never take away Dan’s reclining abilities, but we can give him a chair that has both style and butt comfort. The Sedgwick Recliner from West Elm is perfect for this modern update. Again, the dark grey color will hide beer stains and will allow us to go a little crazy with throw pillow and blankets.
For the second chair, I’d add some color by going with the Acec chair from CB2 in Bayoux (which is a color I’ve never heard of, but I’ll accept that exists… it’s aqua, basically). The blue-green shade compliments the feature wall’s wallpaper, and helps brighten the space.
Coffee Table- The Conners need a large and functional coffee table, so I would go with the Handcrafted Walnut Coffee Table from Dot & Bo for the space. It’s both beautiful and classic– plus, as a bonus, it adds extra storage space with its black paper-cord shelf. Now Aunt Jackie will have a place to keep her hipster sweaters when she sleeps over! Win-win!
Accent Tables- I’ve been obsessed with the For the Record Table in Oak from Dot & Bo for some time. It’s adorable. And it would be great in the Conner’s living room. Dan and Roseanne will have a place to store and show-off their record collection. Vintage records as home accents is a thing millennials are so into right now– which means it’s “cool”. And you know how Roseanne likes to be the cool mom and grandma.
Media Console- Okay, we’ve got to get rid of that wooden boxed television set, which you can only find at your great-grandma’s house these days (if she’s still alive, God bless her!). Those TV boxes were a solid attempt at classy-ing up old tube televisions, but since TVs are now thinner than Bethenny Frankel (skinny joke for the win!), we don’t need them. Instead, let’s go with a really modern and fun piece like the Staggered Wood Console from West Elm. With plenty of room for both the TV and Roseanne’s tchotchkes, this console is a great addition to the space!
So now that we’ve got the furniture settled, we can focus on the fun stuff: home accents! Squeeeeeee! Overall, I don’t hate the accents in the Conner living room (keep that a secret). In particular, the throw pillows would look great on the updated dark grey sofa. In keeping with the yellowish-greenish color motif, and because you can never have enough home accessories, I’d add these:
A. As an homage to the famous Godzilla toy masquerading as decoration in the Conner home, this fun throw pillow has a vintage flair, and would look great on Dan’s new recliner chair.
B. The famous Conner wall telephone is now an antiquity, but the Chatterbox pillow from Dot & Bo reminds us of that bygone era– an era when Becky wouldn’t get off the phone so that Roseanne could ignore calls from her mother. Oh, the good ol’ days!
C. This bright throw pillow from Dot & Bo is called Sunny Day, and it fits in quite well with Roseanne’s current choice of throw pillows… which aren’t completely unfortunate.
E. The only two things that Roseanne loves more than the tacky chicken shirt are Jerry Garcia from the Grateful Dead and Elvis Presley. You can see a few Elvis doodads in the Conner home (and TBH, in my home too). Plus, she named a child after Jerry Garcia (now that’s class). But instead of decorative plates featuring our idols, I thought these pop art prints would add a little touch color and happiness to the room.
F. There is no need to change perfection, that’s why I would include this afghan blanket from Etsy in the modern makeover of the living room. I probably wouldn’t throw it over the sofa, but I think it would look great on the Avec chair from CB2.
G. I know that a Tiffany lamp represents class to a lot of people, but I just plain don’t like them. Sorry bout’ it. I think they belong in the annuls of design history (haha… I said annuls). Instead of the Tiffany lamp, how about this modern Waxing Moon Table Lamp from Dot & Bo? It kind of looks like a Tiffany lamp, but it won’t make you smell like Polident and Aspercreme.
So what do you think of this modern upgrade for Conner fam? Would you have kept the afghan? Are you offended because you like the smell of Polident? How many throw pillows are too many? Do you think Roseanne loves me? Well, do you?