Oh that Target

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I make no bones about my love for Target– and it’s not just because my pale ass doesn’t have to go outside to get there! No, what I have with Target is something special, something real. If I had a baby, I would name it Target. That’s how much I love it (and a very big reason why I don’t have children! Oh the names I would come up with! Fleek! LePaul! Snautchit! Chocobits!).

So while it never comes as a shock to me when I find something cute there, I’m always surprised when I find it in my home. I guess I get so excited that I am unable to resist ALLOFTHECUTETHINGS, and I fall into some sort of “Target fog”… a big ol’ gay fugue state, if you will. And it happened to me again this week! So, without further ado (or shame), look at this Target stuff I forgot I bought:

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I’ve been lusting after this Nate Berkus bowl since I saw it… which is also when I bought it. Because, no self-control. Ain’t a problem though– it was only $17.99! Now I have a place to show off my geometric fruits! Like pineapples! And… and… um… applegons! Google it.

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I made a beeline for these socks when I saw them, which was probably very confusing because I let my cart continue down the aisle on its own. Don’t worry though, that old lady had a titanium hip. She took it like a champ. And it was all worth it anyway because I scored these adorable socks, by Pair of Thieves… my new favorite brand. Seriously, check out them out. One of their socks is called the Bordeauxn’t! Now that’s speakin’ my language.

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Yes, I know how to write with a pencil. Save your jokes. But can anyone tell me what a “pencil sharpener” is? Sounds dangerous.

Also, those push pins. Am I right? How cute are they?! I have no functional use for them, but I couldn’t resist. Maybe I’ll use them to hang up pictures of your ugly children. That way, at least I’ll have the pins to look at instead of, you know, your monsters’ grotesque little faces (I’m just joking! If I thought your kid was ugly, trust me honey, you’d know).

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And finally, this successful Target haze ends with a cute and budget-friendly (Read: CHEAP) spray bottle. Now I can squirt my plants! Who doesn’t like a little squirt now and then? And don’t be gross—- I was referring to sexual things.

Have a good Sunday evening! Don’t drink too much tonight! Tomorrow is Monday! You know, the day you are actually reading this on… at your desk, and instead of working. That’s what I’m here for!!!!!!!!

  One thought on “Oh that Target

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